Just because the undead’s taste buds are atrophying doesn’t mean yours have to!
You duck into the safest-looking abandoned house you can find and hold your breath as you listen for the approaching zombie horde you’ve been running from all day. You hear a gurgling sound. Is it the undead? No—it’s your stomach.
When the zombie apocalypse tears down life and society as we know it, it will mean no more take out, no more brightly lit, immaculately organized aisles of food just waiting to be plucked effortlessly off the shelves. No more trips down to the local farmers’ market. No more microwaved meals in front of the TV or intimate dinner parties. No, when the undead rise, eating will be hard, and doing it successfully will become an art.
The Art of Eating through the Zombie Apocalypse is a cookbook and culinary field guide for the busy zpoc survivor. With more than 80 recipes (from Overnight of the Living Dead French Toast and It’s Not Easy Growing Greens Salad to Down & Out Sauerkraut, Honey & Blackberry Mead, and Twinkie Trifle), scads of gastronomic survival tips, and dozens of diagrams and illustrations that help you scavenge, forage, and improvise your way to an artful post-apocalypse meal. The Art of Eating is the ideal handbook for efficient food sourcing and inventive meal preparation in the event of an undead uprising.
Whether you decide to hole up in your own home or bug out into the wilderness, whether you prefer to scavenge the dregs of society or try your hand at apocalyptic agriculture, and regardless of your level of skill or preparation, The Art of Eating will help you navigate the wasteland and make the most of what you eat.
You duck into the safest-looking abandoned house you can find and hold your breath as you listen for the approaching zombie horde you’ve been running from all day. You hear a gurgling sound. Is it the undead? No—it’s your stomach.
When the zombie apocalypse tears down life and society as we know it, it will mean no more take out, no more brightly lit, immaculately organized aisles of food just waiting to be plucked effortlessly off the shelves. No more trips down to the local farmers’ market. No more microwaved meals in front of the TV or intimate dinner parties. No, when the undead rise, eating will be hard, and doing it successfully will become an art.
The Art of Eating through the Zombie Apocalypse is a cookbook and culinary field guide for the busy zpoc survivor. With more than 80 recipes (from Overnight of the Living Dead French Toast and It’s Not Easy Growing Greens Salad to Down & Out Sauerkraut, Honey & Blackberry Mead, and Twinkie Trifle), scads of gastronomic survival tips, and dozens of diagrams and illustrations that help you scavenge, forage, and improvise your way to an artful post-apocalypse meal. The Art of Eating is the ideal handbook for efficient food sourcing and inventive meal preparation in the event of an undead uprising.
Whether you decide to hole up in your own home or bug out into the wilderness, whether you prefer to scavenge the dregs of society or try your hand at apocalyptic agriculture, and regardless of your level of skill or preparation, The Art of Eating will help you navigate the wasteland and make the most of what you eat.
Geedunk Magical Layer Bars
1
Hungry Survivor or Regular Joe serving
The
word “Geedunk” is old Navy slang for candy, chips, and soda and reportedly comes
from the sound these items made when they fell out of a vending machine. The name
is appropriate here because this MRE version of the Magic Layer Bar consists
almost entirely (unless you substitute the Chocolate Peanut Spread for Peanut Butter,
then entirely) of junk.
I
won’t lie, these pale in comparison to the pre-zpoc originals. But if they can satisfy
my sweet tooth, chances are yours will be satisfied too. After all the living hell
you’ve been through, your brain probably can’t even conjure a decent memory of
what the originals tasted like, anyway. Yum!
The ingredients
for this recipe can be found in the following 2012-issue MREs:
·
Fudge Brownie: Menu #2
·
Blackberry Jam: Menus #3, 9, 16,
19, 22
·
Chocolate Chip Toaster Pastry:
Menu #4
·
Chocolate Peanut Spread: Menu #6 or
Peanut Butter: Menus #3, 9, 12, 13, 14, 16, 19, 22
·
Peanut M&M’s: Menu #13 or
Plain M&M’s: Menu Menu #15
·
Kreamsicle Cookie: Menus #6, 7,
11
Requires:
Chef’s
or survival knife and cutting board
1 plate
or bowl
Heat Source:
1
Flameless Ration Heater
Time:
10
minutes
Ingredients:
1 x MRE-issue
Chocolate Peanut Spread or Peanut Butter
1 x
MRE-issue Fudge Brownie
1 x
MRE-issue Blackberry Jam
1 x
MRE-issue Chocolate Chip Toaster Pastry
1 x
MRE-issue Peanut M&M’s or Plain M&M’s, crushed
1 x
MRE-issue Kreamsicle Cookie, crushed
Method:
1.
Use a Flameless Ration Heater to
warm the Chocolate Peanut Spread or Peanut Butter for about a minute, to loosen
it slightly and make it more spreadable.
2.
In the meantime, remove the Fudge
Brownie from its packaging and lay it, upside down, on a plate or in a bowl.
Spread a thick layer of Blackberry Jam over the brownie.
3.
Remove the spread from the heater
and set aside. Carefully remove the Chocolate Chip Toaster Pastry from its package
(it’s delicate!) and layer on top of the brownie. Spread a thick layer of the
Chocolate Peanut Spread or Peanut Butter onto the pastry.
4.
Sprinkle liberally with the
crushed M&M’s and Kreamsicle Cookie.
5.
Cut your creation in half and
devour.
